Memory Lane

Memory Lane

It was a dusky evening of 1984, when I was in Germany. I went there to receive training in my current speciality. In India I left my three year old daughter and a loving husband. It was a difficult decision to leave a child and also a hubby like Sushil; so caring and amorous. It was Sushil’s decision that I should go and avail such a prestigious award which was received only by two Indians. I still remember how many nights were sleepless for both of us. His decision is still paying me the rewards. Oh the thoughts have taken me somewhere else. So, it was a dusky evening of 1984, I was walking from my house to the post office. This was my daily routine as I had promised Sushil that every day I will post one letter. This walk was part of this pledge which I took before leaving India. During these evening walks I always came across a house and a child, 8-9 years old. This girl was always standing behind the close bars of a window; all the time looking outside as if searching for something. That evening I stopped near the window and smiled, she reciprocated. I did not know German so could not talk to her but now every day a stopover for 5-10 minutes became routine. Both of us started talking to each other in a sign language. I came to know she is the only child with a single parent and her mother used to go for work in those hours of the day. She used to stand near the window to share her loneliness with the people walking on the road side. I always felt sorry for her and the 10-15 minutes turned into hours by the time I left Essen.

 It is strange that the things you pity others for some times become part of your own life. Exactly when my own daughter was of the same age she became the child of a single parent; Sushil left me forever. I do not in which window she stood, who shared her solitude, who talked to her for hours in a sign language but I am proud of her that she courageously faced  that period without making any complaints to me.

THIS HOLI

THIS HOLI

As usual like any other day I got up at 3.30AM. My servants are not at home. I thought without them how will the house get cleaned. For me, it is unbearable to leave the house unclean that too on the day of the festival. I was not well having high BP last night with heart burn. I gathered the courage to clean the house. By 8AM I was totally free. I thought to take bath but then thinking that today is holi I restrained myself. I went outside to see if there is someone with whom I can play. There were some children they wished me happy Holi. I smiled blessed them and came inside. Now what to do. By that time Shanti my neighbour’s servant came to give me Gujia. I was happy to see that someone has come. I gave her sweets and some money for the kids. It was only 9AM by this time. I thought let me take bath but again restrained thinking that someone may come to play Holi.

By 9.30 it was height for me thinking why people take so much time in starting the festival. I took some good cloths opened the Gulal packet went out to see if a soul is there. Luckily I found elder Mr Verma outside the house. To me it was a treasure. I immediately approached him put tilik on his forehead, wished him happy holi, went to their home met his family members, came down and moved towards the park where everyone plays holi. Not even a single person was there. It was 10AM. For me it was too much. I took some Dal and rise and started preparing it and went to take bath. After that I took my lunch it was 11AM. I heard a loud music some hustle and bustle on the road. People were going on the road to play holi laughing and playing. At 12PM Dr Amita came to wish me holi and could recognize that I have taken bath and said I will not put colour on you as you have. She went to play holi in the park. Every year we both use to go together but this time she went alone.

I came and sat on sofa thinking why cannot even for a single day I can postpone things and go with the wordily affairs. BUT THAT IS ME thinking this I satisfied myself. THIS WAS HOLI 8^th MARCH 2012.